Obviously, I have no child and that's not an option right now (I mean really.). I figured I should start out with that disclaimer cuz of the title. I was just on PI and reading this letter that a woman wrote to her baby that died early in the pregnancy. It made me tear up because I never realized how hard it must be. My mom lost 6 babies that way. 6! This woman is tore up over the one and she's getting help and my mom lost 6 and my dad wasn't even there to support her.
Objectively, a child is nothing more than a parasite. A parasite is something that... takes nutrients from a host. A child lives inside the mother and, let's be realistic, very few women say "yes, I would like to have a child from this session of sex" or even want one when they get pregnant. Something happens, there's some sort of hormone though that changes that idea. Something that changes the "ehh. crap. not right now" feeling to "*love!!!*" That's weird to me. Natural but weird. I can't imagine such a change of heart that's not made by choice.
I'm trying to figure out how much my mom would have loved me. I was born after four miscarriages (she had another when I was a year old or so and another when I was four or five). So I really was her "miracle baby," as she always called me. And she was a stay-at home mom. She helped out in my pre-school, pre-K, and she cooked at my school cafeteria. I think I get it now. She was scared that something would happen to me and I was her only chance of a baby, as well as a gift after all the miscarriages. When my dad took me away from her, that was what she was trying to avoid all along. That really is what destroyed her... Or maybe what killed her more is the fact that she had already begun to lose it
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